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Creationists join the fight against climate change

The following report (details here) may sound as a joke from The Onion except that it is apparently quite serious. ;-)

Creationists, evolutionists join forces

Leaders of the creationist Christian community have joined the forces with biologists who fight against the "climate change" and urged president Bush to join them, too. The great news results from a dialogue organized by Harvard University.

J. McCarthy who is still alive argued that the new union protects all life on Earth. The name of J. McCarthy gives the new unified movement a distinctly democratic flavor.



Figure 1: Rev. Richard Cizik argues that polluters have to answer God, not only the government led by Al Gore. Amen. The article linked in the previous sentence scientifically explains, using Genesis 2:15 and Revelation 11:18, that creation care is isomorphic to environmentalism and that God the Almighty will destroy those who destroy earth. Also, he explains that the scientists who interpret "dominion over the fish of the sea" in the Bible as "domination" are deeply flawed heretics.




The principal faith leader Richard Cizik has explained that "many evangelicals think that environmentalism is about pantheism and paganism and new-age religions". In order to remove this stigma and a perceived link with the heretics, new terminology for science had to be adopted.




Richard Cizik and his boss, Rev. Ted Haggard, have already helped God to punish the Republicans who didn't support the global warming theory. They have mixed the Bible with the climate change which led to the lost elections for the G.O.P.

McCarthy has clarified that those scientists who also fight against the global warming - and who represent the scientific consensus - have agreed that life on this planet should be called "the creation" from now on in order to show their respect for His work. Indeed, the scientists were quite comfortable with these improvements to their field and they have praised the evangelicals for their respect for dignity and objectivity of science. Everyone agreed that small differences in their opinions about the origin of life can't obscure the main point where everyone (except for the despicable heretics and devils) agrees: that the mankind is approaching a judgement day.



Figure 2: A new scientific consensus between the evolutionists and the creationists led to a general adoption for a politically correct term "the creation" for life on Earth. The breakthrough that followed two months of negotiations was announced at a press conference in Washington, D.C.

McCarthy has explained that there has been little friction between the scientists and the creationists and their union has already won the support of both sides of the political divide including Barack Obama from the United Church of Christ, Hillary Clinton from the Methodist Church, as well as Olympia Snowe from the Greek Orthodox Church, and John McCain from the Episcopalian church. It hasn't been reported whether the third most important scientific force, the Church of Islam, also agrees with the new scientific consensus but the answer is probably Yes.

Australian agencies inform that the new scientific consensus expressed in the "Urgent Call for Action" (full text in PDF) that unites many churches including the scientific ones into an unprecedented coalition will influence the State of the Union address and all children of God - which, after five difficult centuries polluted by heretics such as Galileo Galilei, finally includes the whole scientific community again - should celebrate.

More seriously

Well, The Reference Frame would still think that they have only won the support of one side of a more important divide - support of religious bigots and simple-minded people who are deeply confused by science.

It is no secret that the "climate change" has always been religion and this 100% harmony with the creationists shouldn't come as a surprise because both of these groups share the same basic principles - irrationality, group-think, and a tendency to switch from the material content to emotions and pseudo-moral calls.

A year ago, the scientific consensus only included the judgment day as envisioned by Al Gore. In 2007, the same consensus also covers the concept of creation and God's anger against polluters. Science is developing quite rapidly - approximately by minus five centuries a year.

We seem to be entering a new dark era - the era of Gospel of Climate Change, if you wish - in which you may be burned at stake if you notice any obvious fact, for example that all the people whose names appear in this article are nutcases. Too bad that the list includes several U.S. presidential candidates as well as Eric Chivian who is the director of the Centre for Health and the Global Environment at Harvard Medical School and a former (1985) Nobel prize winner, unfortunately only for peace. Chivian has been a long-time friend of Cizik, the green evangelical leader.

The global warming "science" believers are probably hopeless - but couldn't at least the evangelicals realize that they follow the steps of anti-Christ? ;-)

See: news.google.com

In order to see how extremely polarizing this topic is - and to show you that one shouldn't yet give up science and common sense - you can see about 1200 comments plus previous 1600+ comments (discussion stopped) to Heidi Cullen's painful proposal to segregate the climate skeptics. About 90 percent of them are negative towards Dr. Cullen. One can still believe that America and the civilization are not lost. On the other hand, although her proposals are outrageous, The Reference Frame admits that she has courage.

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reader Bruce Hall said...

Lubos,

You had me there for a minute. Nicely done.