Sunday, September 07, 2008

IPCC boss: meat-free Sundays

The Nobel prize winners at the United Nations began to appreciate that
farm animals emit 1/5 of greenhouse gases.
Meat production is an important part of the sin that, in fact, exceeds transportation. The transportation industry could have felt discriminated against but these days are over.

Similar pictures will soon belong to history textbooks (chapters about wars and destruction).

"Dr" (no, sorry, I won't recognize his degrees) Rajendra Pachauri, who is already a vegetarian, now requests that people should have
one meat-free day a week (AFP, BBC)
unless they want to become heretics. "Give up meat for one day (per week) initially, and decrease it from there," the official planetary chief to deal with the climate emergency ordered. Did his co-winner hear him?

The Guardian has also determined that the main culprit are Sundays. You may want to start today.

Food Climate Research Network at Surrey University added that people should also avoid milk, butter, and cheese if they want the carbon dioxide and methane reductions to be real.

By 2010, the Kyoto protocol requires a 29% = 2/7 drop in the greenhouse emissions. That means two meat-free days a week. The United Nations recommend you the weekends.

Clearly, these modest sacrifices are not enough to save the planet. Australia was originally supposed to cut the greenhouse emissions by 60% by 2050, demanding four meat-free days a week. However, Ross Garnaut's report requested the Australian government to reduce them by 80%, i.e. to have five or six meat-free days a week. We can't allow the planet to heat up by 0.2 °C (the contibution of meat per century) just because a few billion people would find it convenient to eat meat.

It should be pointed out that meat-free diets generate some greenhouse gases, too. It means that by 2050, you should only eat one day a week. Can we do it? Yes, we can!

Similar comments apply to drinks and water. It is clear why beverages with CO2 - such as beer (2 volumes) or sodas (4 volumes) - have to be banned.

However, we have seen true leaders, Pachauri's countrymates, who have made it clear that we should (and could) shun water, too. When Mahatma Gandhi was once given a bucket of water, he began to cry because he realized that the water would be missing in the Ganges.

Breathing is another culprit. I hope that the responsible readers can already calculate how many days a week they should breathe.

More seriously, I think that the Czech authorities should catch Mr Pachauri and confine him into a psychiatric asylum as soon as he dares appear on our territory. I normally hate mafias but I have to agree with this guy in the Mafia 2 game about meat and the IPCC animals.

1 comment:

  1. You failed to mention flatulence as a source of methane, another extremely nasty greenhouse gas. To avoid flatulence, we must have a few bean-free days a week. Also included should be dishes which contain beans, such as chili. This in turn will require a reduction in the Mexican population, suggesting they abandon Catholicism and change affiliation, perhaps becoming Buddhist. Thus, the cycle is complete... reducing Mexican populations will reduce chili consumption which will in turn reduce bean consumption which in turn will reduce methane production and we have all taken another giant leap forward in saving the planet.