Wednesday, April 01, 2009

RealClimate.ORG abolished

As some of you may have expected, some members of the RealClimate.ORG have always been sane. They have evaluated the Heartland Institute's conference of climate realists and determined the the science is settled.

The realists have always been right, the group now says, which is why their propagandistic website, RealClimate.ORG, can finally be abolished:
Farewell to our readers
Even Rajendra Pachauri of the IPCC has eaten a couple of steaks and revived most of his sleeping neural vegetarian cells in his brain:
Scientists worldwide admit global warming is a hoax
Al Gore has finally urged the police to put him in the prison, too. So everything starts to make sense and people who have been considered brain-dead for many years are becoming a part of our society.

In related news, Peter Woit and Lee Smolin (who just solved the cosmological constant problem today, together with Chandra Prescod-Weinstein, extending methods of Marco Polo) have understood why they have been obnoxious crackpots for many years, they have apologized to everyone whom they have hurt during all those years, and offered all of their resources in an attempt to undo some of the most immoral acts that they have been doing for such a long time.

Congratulations - one day is enough and pretty much everything in the world starts to work properly! The newest developments also prove that Sean Carroll was right that the arrow of time can flip at any moment: high-entropy, oxidated brains can always undo the disintegration process and become healthy once again.

The Bogzabraloff brothers were interviewed by an out-of-equilibrium journalist. ;-)

Google has finally released the 3D version of Google Chrome (download) and they are planning to introduce the remaining 6-7 dimensions later in the year. Back-Angela Merkel's double brother-in-law, Robert Scherrer, has proven the basic thesis of Hermeneutics of Quantum Gravity:
In this way the infinite-dimensional invariance group erodes the distinction between observer and observed; the π of Euclid and the G of Newton, formerly thought to be constant and universal, are now perceived in their ineluctable historicity; and the putative observer becomes fatally de-centered, disconnected from any epistemic link to a space-time point that can no longer be defined by geometry alone.
The paper has been supported by the Fermilab where elementary particles attempted to take over.

The Vatican has clarified their definition of a prayer.

The Sun has interrupted its recent silence and a huge area of sun spots has kicked the SSN sunspot number to 489. It remains to be seen whether the Sun will continue burning or whether it will stop and protect the Earth from global warming. Click the picture for more information. The refreshing sunspots may have been caused by a mixture of beef gases with bovine fish oil.

1 comment:

  1. That was great. I also heard that Obama has realized his economic policies are completely retarded, and that we should just accept the inevitable recession instead of delaying it, because delaying it will only amplify the massive inflation soon to take place as the dollar crashes. And oh yes, Einstein has spoken from the grave that he has changed his views on the entanglement business, now believing in orthodox quantum mechanics. :)