Sunday, November 03, 2019

Greta asks you to find a carbon-neutral transport to Madrid

During the summer, a friend of a friend of mine, a famous spoiled brat named Greta Thunberg, spent weeks on a yacht, going from Europe to the New World. Meanwhile, a dozen of employees who are working for her were flying in between the continents. The main goal of this ritual wasn't her hysterical outburst in New York, however incredible it was. The main purpose of her trip was the COP25 climate conference in Santiago de Chile.

However, due to the "pro-equality" leftist demonstrations and chaos in Chile (which Greta, a hardcore leftist herself, has explicitly endorsed!), COP25 and another meeting was cancelled. Meanwhile, the leading bureaucrats among the climate fearmongers have moved the COP25 event from Santiago to Madrid.

They probably thought it was a great idea. However, the main participant of the COP25 summit, Greta Thunberg – the Prophet who is the director supervising the U.N. boss Guterres and whose importance exceeds that of 50 Michaels Männer – found herself in a nontrivial situation.

She needs to get from North America to Madrid within 29 days. It's hard. Most adult climate fearmongers solve this problem trivially: they take a private jet and announce that they have paid someone to make that flight carbon-neutral by murdering 1,000 black kids in Africa or something like that. Can Greta credibly announce the same solution?

Her tweet shows her complete inability to think outside the box because she wants to "find a way to cross the Atlantic". Maybe a better idea would be for her to find a way to cross the Pacific, as the map above shows.

OK, your help will be appreciated by Greta Thunberg. Only serious proposals will be considered – so keep "Leonardo DiCaprio's private jet" for your puppies. She's traveled half around the world, wrong way, along with all the staff that has been moving in the wrong way for half a year, too. She is clearly a great example of the efficiency of the transportation and the economy in general that is led by the people who are afraid of the climate change.

Sane people know that this isn't how the world economy could sensibly operate. But the people who have been brainwashed by the climate hysteria aren't sane anymore. Even when things get this comically bad, they are still incapable of learning any lesson. Surely, these cumbersome transfers that have employed a team of people and took half a year – but turned out to be a complete waste of time and resources – are just a sign of bad luck. Surely the world will be a better place when the hysterical girl will be taken as an example by everyone!

Note that if she were flying between Europe and America, she would probably postpone the flight to Santiago to the early December – so she would cancelled that planned flight now and she would be in Europe now, close enough to Madrid, instead of being stuck in North America now! So the carbon-neutral rituals have made the situation and useless travels strictly worse.

I urge her and all her supporters to reduce their carbon footprints by swimming in the ocean even if it means transitioning to a corpse; if she is a real Daughter of God, she could be resurrected a few days later. This procedure would also solve all the real problems with the climate change. So far, the only viable proposed alternatives are for her to part the seas like Moses; or walk on the water like Jesus. My idea is that she could order Google to censor the denialist Atlantic Ocean on the Google Maps.

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